Dvar Torah for Parshat HaChodesh

Based on Likutey Halakhot, Hilkhot Kriat HaTorah 6:17 and Likutey Halakhot, Hilkhot Birkhot HaRiyah 5:11

This Shabbat we read Parshat HaChodesh (Exodus 12:1-20) wherein we are commanded to sanctify the month each time the moon begins anew its cycle/orbit around the earth. So, apropos of that we will discuss Jewish renewal.

(Before we get started, however, there's a point of information that has to be made. Even though the Jewish calendar is lunar-based (we count our months and years according to the cycles of the moon) the Torah specifically calls Nisan, the month in which Pesach is celebrated, the spring month (Exodus 13:4). From here our Sages learn that the lunar year must conform with the solar one. So occasionally, as this year 5757, the lunar year has a leap-month added to it.)

God renews creation every day, "opening the doors of the Eastern Gates, tearing open the windows of the sky" to send the sun and moon on their way to shine upon all His creations. Hashem (God) does this so that you and I will see His kindness and remember Him the whole day through.

The true light of the sun and the moon is the light of daat (awareness), the light of remembering. The light of each, in its own way, reminds us of the World to Come, of our eternal destiny. Sunlight, the light of Torah, reminds us in a general that there is a World to Come, a time when Hashem's greatness will be more revealed and we will see Him eye to eye, as it were. Moonlight, the light of faith, is a light that shines only when it stays focused, when it receives from the sun. It then shines on a more limited area, showing us where God is in the details.

In His goodness Hashem wants us to start the World to Come now. For unless one prepares himself in the hall he cannot enter the ballroom (Avot 4:21). By remembering Hashem throughout the day we can understand how the events of our lives are His calls to us to draw near.

But, let's face it. Who can remember anything, even if it's the Blessed Creator, let alone summon up the strength and courage to do something about it?

Because the truth is we often feel trapped by circumstances (some of our own making and some not). These circumstances often seem interminable. We feel certain that they - and we - will never and can never change. Yet, at times, we feel that we would like another chance. We want to feel successful, that we are truly being good Jews. So with the best of intentions we go looking for solutions.

Some of us try very hard, in a variety of ways, to accomplish this by changing externals. "I'll change my school/spouse/job and then I'll be a good Jew." "I'll move to that neighborhood/city and then...." "Tomorrow will be easier. Then I'll be...." "Yiddishkeit (Judaism) seems to be missing something. Those Buddhists/Catholics/Masons have some really spiritual practices. I'm sure they can be grafted on to dear Judaism without harm." Fact is though, there is no magic wand we can wave to change any externals. We can, however, approach the problem from a different angle. To paraphrase the Bard, "Perhaps, dear Jew, the fault is not in life/Yiddishkeit, but in yourself."

Look up. See the renewal that takes place in the sky, everyday and every month.

If you pity yourself and consider your eternal destiny, then no matter what your situation there is but one option: Realize every day that you are literally a brand new creation. That's a fact. This is why we make the Birkhot Hashachar (blessings of the morning) everyday. No matter what, view the spiritual work that awaits you each day as totally and absolutely new, for every Jew is presented with the opportunity to a number of mitzvot everyday.

It's crucial to realize that today has never been before and never again will be. And that you, alive today, have the mission to do today's mitzvot. No angel or saint of yesteryear can do them. If you believe yourself to be a good-for-nothing bum, all the better. Because then God's name is all the more glorified if the likes of you does a mitzvah....

The main tactic is to start again. And even if you can't do anything because the exile is crushing your body, soul and finances, at least prepare yourself. Stir up your ratzon (desire) to do mitzvot. You may have to start thousands of times a day....

Don't despair. No good intention is ever lost. These good desires eventually accumulate giving you the merit to properly accomplish your mission. But to remember the future you must forget the past; what you have lived through and all your past starts. You must feel that you've never begun before....

For even a lifetime sinner who repents at the last possible moment, on his deathbed, is forgiven for everything (Kiddushin 40b). How much more so for those of us who constantly try again and again to improve.

The main reason people drop out of Judaism is their history of failure. They become convinced that success is beyond their grasp. So the main thing is to always start anew - like the sun, like the moon - and discount all your past starts. Begin now! As if you've never begun before. And keep doing so until you reach your ultimate perfection.

agutn Shabbos!
Shabbat Shalom!